Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Big-Shot Aussie Politician to Speak at VBYC?

The Windsurf Your Goddamn Face Off editorial board has officially invited unsuccessful Australian Senate candidate Ben Peterson to speak at next Labour Day Weekend's annual VBYC wind-up.

Last night, Commodore Ken Taylor ratified a proposal that would have Mr. Peterson's travel expenses and beer tab be covered by a slush fund to be diverted from the expansion account.

Labour Day Weekend, a statutory holiday in Canada in honour of the blistered hands and blue collars that built this wonderful country, is a perfect time for a member of Australia's powerful Socialist Alliance to speak to interested VBYC members on matters of universal concern.

Yesterday, we (belatedly, it turns out) endorsed Mr. Peterson for the Western Australian Senate seat (see previous post and comments).

Mr. Peterson, our rudders are now in your hands.

Monday, November 29, 2010

Way to Go Benny !

On behalf of the entire syndicate here at "Windsurf Your God Damn Face Off" I would like to congratulate Ben Peterson on his nomination for a Senate position with the Socialist Alliance. Besides being a prolific windsurfer, Benny is a strong anti "the man" advocate, displaying his opposition to corporate and political "Big Wigs" on and off the water. After a shocking nomination from neoconservative Patrice Milligan we asked Benny how he was feeling about everything.

"I'm excited to have the opportunity to run as a senate candidate for Socialist Alliance because I think it is the new generation of windsurfers that will be the ones to bring change on the issues like the fall crow hunt and kite boarding, where real change is needed. The Labor and Liberal parties have both consistently let down Victoria Beach people by their craven support for corporate (club) interests. The Socialist Alliance stands for 'people before profit' and that's the kind of change I'd like to see in Municipal politics."

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

VBYC sailors discuss the wind

“There was a pretty good South wind yesterday. I took my Hobie 18 out just as it picked up to about 17 knots and veered to the Southwest. I was actually flying a hull for a bit. Then it backed to the South and died. But it was good for a bit.” As Commodore Ken Taylor reminisced, Ryan Van Berkel was adjusting a cotter pin. “Yeah, it looked pretty windy from here on the beach.” Meanwhile, up on the Yacht Club deck, Greg Thomas hung his yellow life vest on the rail as he filled his eldest son in on the details of the last race of the Red Eye; “Hey Jame, Jame, Jame! Jeez, I was just cruising along on a beam reach when a big gust hit and nearly knocked me down! Holy smokes!”

Friday, November 5, 2010

Angry Lake Lashes out at Indolent V.B Sailors

An enraged Lake Winnipeg unleashed fury on languid sailors at Victoria Beach on October 28 2010, what has been dubbed a “weather bomb” the storm wreaked havoc on the entire South Basin, severely eroding shorelines, damaging property, and curiously taking a direct strike at the Victoria Beach Yacht Club.

About the storm, Environment Canada Meteorologist and Lake Winnipeg climate expert Carl Carlson explained: “Essentially the perfect conditions for a severe storm made themselves present and the barometer dropped like a brick to record low levels, winds as high as 100km/hr whipped up from the North West essentially funneling water from the much larger North basin in to the South basin at an alarming rate. The result was a tremendous rise in water levels over a very short period of time in the south basin coupled with unusually strong winds, and as a consequence flooding, erosion, and heavy damage to much of the basin, including the Victoria Beach Yacht Club”.

As if the situation weren’t grim enough a potential new motive for the storm has reared its ugly head. After surveying the damage to the VBYC boats and compound and after conferring with VBYC executive members Carlson was less convinced that this was just a random act of climatic violence. Carlson elaborated: “Everyone is quick to point to climate chames as the cause but I think there’s something else going on here, you might even say a hidden agenda on the part of the storm”.

After weighing all of the evidence, Carlson was led to this startling conclusion: The storm may have been targeting languid sailors. After consultations with VBYC executive committee representatives, several facts are clear: The storm appears to have targeted some of the least dedicated sailors, whose boats over the years have been rotting in the VBYC compound and on the shores of yacht club beach, rarely ever having their sails hoisted or hulls refreshed by the water. Some underused boats are missing completely, while many were left full of water and scattered about the compound from the rising tide. It is unknown and a dubious exercise to predict how many languorous sailors can be bothered with draining and moving their boats before the harsh prairie winter most likely does irreparable damage, but hopes are not high. In this regard it appears the lake may have simply been culling the weak of the V.B sailing herd so to speak, essentially instituting its own form of Darwinian evolution on the sailing scene.

Local sailing prodigy Matthew “Cannonball” MacLeod offered his take: “Maybe the sailors are soothing to the lake, you know like a good back scratch, and with less and less of them getting out, the lake just kind of snapped, it couldn’t scratch the itch”. Carlson wouldn’t confirm nor deny these sentiments but did have a message for VBYC members: “For V.B sailors this is a clear wake up call, the lake is angry at the pitiful number of sailors on the water. This was no weather bomb, it was a shit bomb dropped on lazy VB sailors”.

VBYC Insider